During the rehearsals, the big issue we faced was to get proper rooms. The difficulty of finding a room big enough where the dancer could dance and we could do our performance movements, where we could check our movements and interaction, was almost impossible. Adding to the problem was the installation of the speakers for the sonologist and connection of computer, microphone and the T-microphone for my instrument. In addition, when there was the possibility of getting a studio or a hall in the Conservatory, the time frame I could reserve it for was not enough in order to make all the technologies work as well as practice the performance.
To conclude, investing in these fields was not only challenging and positive for my classical playing, but also a way of improving all kinds of skills. The process has motivated me to continue working in developing improvisation on my instrument and to have better knowledge of my own body.
During the last months I became a composer, and an improviser and this gave me a clearer idea about what composers want from musicians who play their pieces. Because of that, I am able to have a better general impression of the piece and what I want to express. The combination of the two practices (music and dance) increased my self-confidence, and created awareness and a feeling of safety while performing on stage. Previously I was afraid to play concerts and now I want to play often because I enjoy that people are listening to myself playing. I am able to even go deeper into my emotions and concentrate myself better and I believe this makes my playing more convincing. The freedom I developed during the body movement and dance lessons is a long way from what Conservatories generally offer to students. I would recommend to all students to do improvisation and to have a better knowledge about their own body in order to become a more expressive performer. As Fajo Jansen said in the interview: When you have knowledge about the body and the breathing system, the standing system, grounding, presentation and standing on the stage around you with your skin, the posture goes automatically. It has to do with the all feeling of your emotion with all your body. Are you in your body or not? If you are not in your body, (I call it warm), if you are not warm with your body you can play, but is harder. Playing should come out from your deepest soul.
The performance that resulted from combining the two practices widened my concept of my future as a musician. Improvisation and dance became essential tools for my carrier. The creation of a performance that was built up from my own ideologies and tastes brought me closer to the concept of being an artist.
This research changed my opinion of what a classical musician is. In the past, I had a lot of insecurities about developing my improvising skills and leaving my comfort zone. Through doing this research I made improvement as a musician. Learning improvisation and connecting body movement with music-making helped me to open my personality while playing. The constant contact with my emotions and mood (as well as those in the music) whilst the practicing these two arts (music and dance), made me connect with myself. I became more conscious of how to expressing my emotions through my instrument. As Jane Buttars claims: Improvising provides a direct, intimate connection between our emotions and feelings, our instrument, and the world of sound and music.
Not only did I learn to know myself better, but I also learned to experience life more in the present moment and to worrying less about the future. As Katie Duck mentioned in the interview: Improvisation is a funny word, I consider it biology. […] Improvisation could be a code term that we use to amplify the possibility to be aware of the present with a vision for a future with a minimal burden about what has happened in the past.