April - May 2019 It's only when I rest that I sense your presence, text work, HKS, Bergen


 

This very slight piece of writing has proven significant in the development of my research. Creative, speculative writing and more specifically what might be described as a tentative practice of “site writing” had already begun to become a part of my practice by the time of its creation; not least with my presentation at the Bergen Natural History Museum, in February 2019, but the creation of this short piece represented a novel approach to my artistic writing, which had up to this point focused on a longer form and on a conventional, albeit playful narrative, which was nonetheless written to unfold a thesis, using a relatively unambiguous voice.

 

Although my writing has always been a tool for allowing me to think about my research, here, not only the form of the writing, but also its orientation to the research process has become qualitatively different.

 

I found myself writing not only in response to the process of making ‘It’s only when I rest, that I sense your presence’ (the ventilator installation, I created for HKS), but also in response to my own experience of the completed gallery installation; the words of my writing becoming a part of the process through which I learned about and from my experience of the installation.

 

Rather than try to use my writing forensically, to pin-down the precise nature of that experience, here, my approach became deliberately allusive and fragmentary; the voice adopting the position of an often imperative first person singular; an “I” whose position and identity (possibly human, possibly machine) is not clear.

 

 

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It’s only when I rest that I sense your presence

 

 

  

 

Bodies in space;

Bodies in space, breathing; My body in a space, breathing.

 

 

Pause!

 

Listen,

 

Count,

 

Breathe.

 

 

The body activates the space;

My body; This is not my body; What are these bodies to my body?

 

 

Hold your breath!

 

Listen,

 

Count,

 

Breathe.

 

 

Between speech, between breath, between the occupation of a space;

In the intervals, in the gaps, you and I are becoming.

 

 

Pause!

 

Listen.


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