In this exegesis I discussed the artistic and ethical implications of staging sexual violence from a post victim perspective. The most important aspect of this research has been the search of language. I was surprised to encounter the lack of pre-existing artistic methodologies or vocabularies. The broader societal lack of language around sexual violence and victim narratives appears to be reflected in artistic practices as well. 

The most important discovery was the term post victim in rethinking and expanding existing victim narratives. I considered the problematic historical conventions, specifically in theatre and film of depicting sexual violence through the male gaze. I proposed the gazes of empathic witnessing and feminism as alternatives, to unravel new, more ambiguous and intricate narratives that open space for shared recognition of vulnerability and responsibility.

Within this artistic research I claimed the position of a post victim as an expert of my own experience and used my own embodied experience as an important source. Through placing myself both as an author and a performer, I contribute to destigmatizing victimhood and creating a post victim narrative that goes beyond frailty and helplessness.  

I mapped out a lineage of relevant evocative feminist (mostly solo) performance art works, starting from 1960s body art. The recognition of the canon is in itself a contribution towards the discourse.  

I considered methods and argued how carefully thought-out methodology not only enables ethical ways of working but also creates artistic potential. I discovered the lack of existing methodologies or guidelines in dance. Creating common guidelines for touch, intimacy, nakedness and ethical ways of working in dance, especially due to the nature of the art form working closely with bodies and touch, would be a huge structural step towards a more ethical working field. It could also enable addressing difficult topics with more nuanced and in-depth artistic dialogue. Working with intimacy coordinators, the experts in this field, holds great future artistic research potential fordance.  

Due to the fact that I entered a nearly uncharted territory, I was not able to produce a transferable methodology during this research. Creating a methodology, hand in hand with a vocabulary for working with sexual violence through dance, demands years of future research and experimentation. My experiments of transferring the movement research to other dancers emphasized the need to have an existing methodology in place to address the issues of ethics and artistic depth. I resolved these issues by working through self-experimentation. 

I was able to create a physicality arising from the embodiment of violent penetration, finding its essence in penetration, friction and repetition. I created a movement language based on the choreography of the flesh, with nakedness playing an important role. The ability to verbalize the movement practice was an important discovery. 

Through the movement research I was able to challenge the binaries of passive/ active, and subject/object related to victim narratives. Throughout the self-experimentation I discovered that the personal aspect of the work, even though an important part of the process, did not end up becoming the most prominent aspect of it. I was able to create safe parameters which allowed to dive deep into artistic inquiry. 

This research marks finding ways to explicitly address the topic of sexual violence against women through self-experimentation. However, I believe my research contributes to considering ways of how to address violence, sexuality, nakedness and intimacy through dance in general and how we might unveil their deeper artistic potential. Finding ways to address these topics verbally, artistically and through embodiment holds great transformative potential for makers and audiences. With this research I contribute to the start of a new specific artistic language. I do not intend to propose the “right way” to address sexual violence and victim narratives, but I use my voice to express one way of doing so, thus paving the way for more intricate and complex canon of narratives to come.