Acting in touch. Disappearing of something. Tangentially. Unarticulated. Common. Being involved in this unavoidable, inescapable common process. Inescapable. Reinforced. Vectors of translation. A specific way of modulating some vectors of transformation, of touching, subtly displacing the dynamic threads of the constantly appearing forms and meanings. Withdraws. The other. Common sense. Sensible. Dissolving. Simultaneity. Inside. My ability. In-side. An opening in the continuum of time. Un-solve. Enable. Doing so. Resistant. Happening. Blooming. Expansion. Hold back. Involved. Area. Unavoidable. Conditions. Kairotically. Constitute. Inhabit. Handling. Modulating. Gentle. Withdrawal and falling back. Affirmative, generative. Constraining. Conditioning. Constantly appearing. Common. Micro-movements. To share the presence. Alter. Opening. Give rise. A point of departure. Opening. Blooming. Conditions for the other. Prior. Dissolving. Appearing. Separating. Prerequisite. Substratum. Tangentially. A kind of liquification. Breaks something down. In time. Simultaneity. Radical immanency. Reinforced. Requires gentle handling. Gentle. Plausibility. Felt expansion. Variety of contact. Affect times. Coming to be. The multiple directions. Soften. Soften the effect of chronology. Indirect. Tangential. Plausibility. Hold back. The nature of. Hold back. The other. Gives rise. Coupling. Unarticulated possibility. A force. Depending. Shifting. Involved. The way they appear. Transforming each other. Vectors. Touching. Displacing. Inhibition. Inhabit. Inhibit. Inhabiting inhibition. Involved. Witholding. As a point of departure. Continuing moving together. Continuing acting in touch. Decoupled. Space. Makes it happen. Shifts. Multiple directions. Overcoming. Held. Without an outside. Over-coming. Experience opened. Illusory separation. The operation of dissolving. Blooming. Un-solve. Depends. Depending. Dissolving. Sensible. Solid or stable. Contours. Unarticulated. Interiority. Contradictorily. Extending. A point of departure. Overturning. Dissolve. To sink by the head. Upset. Distemper. Unmingle. Mutual. Unjoin. Touch. Reconnection. Edges. Touch. Without an outside. Holding back. Shift. Solid or stable. Boundaries. Liquid. Inside other. Coming to be. Towards inversion.
18.05.2021
Text generated through the Practice of Reading (Noticing Attraction) using Exploratory Essay 1 as source text, parallel to the Practice of Explorative Drawing.
Mutual conditioning. Without exteriority. Radical Immanency. Inhibition withdraws. Hold back. Over-coming. Felt expansion. Sequencing. Obliquely. Gentle. Dis-placing. Common sense. Acting in touch. Mutually enabling. Mutual conditioning. Mutual transformation. Dissolving. Disappearing. Constitutes. Withdrawal. Indirectly. Con-tact. This through. Something. Blooming. Felt expansion. Sequencing. Emergence. Obliquely. Modulating. Appearing. Without an outside. Ex-tending. Affecting. Happening. Coupling. Synchronicity. Something. Disappearing. Dissolving. Constituting. In-volved, I. Simultaneity. Kairotically. Modulating. Constantly appearing. Destabilised. Disappearing. Dissolving. Enabling. Tangentially. Immanency. Inhabit. Gentle handling. Without an outside. Possibility. Overcoming. Happening. Emerging. Being in time. Moving together. Continuing, acting in touch. Felt expansion. Emerging. Dissolving. Holding back. Emerging. Inhabiting. Dissolving. Felt expansion. Without exteriority. Coupling. Coming. Emerging. Blooming. Indirectly. Constantly appearing.
20.05.2021
Text generated through the Practice of Noticing Attraction (using Exploratory Essay I) parallel to the Practice of the Proximate Sphere.
Protected. Constitution. Articulated. Continuum. No touch. Present. No begin. Separation. No touch. Between. No begin. This. Moment. Articulate present. Infinite variations. Modulating. Carefully. Alternatively. Constant. Complex. Carefully. Articulation. Variation. Modulating. Intention. In touch. Realising. Possibility. Continuing. Partaking. No, begin thus. In between. No cut. No separation. Singularisation. Articulation. Separation. Articulated present. Already present. In action. Before. Now. Continuous. Emanating. Body, a body. Modulating. Curiosity. Continuing. Partaking. Infinite. No separation. Rearrangment. In between. Taking place. Realising. Care, a careless care. Constant. Care. A mutual care. Instead. Already present. Not departing. Aesthetic. Entities. Between. Between. Before that. In. In action. Modulating. Adapting. Itself becoming. That moment. Constant. This one. Infinite. Again. Complex. Articulated. With care. Itself. Mutual. Own. Continuum. Constant. Touch. Zones. Particularies. Modulating. Articulating. Variations. Joinings. Emanating. Articulated continuum. Questioning. Particularities. Units. Already present. Continuing. Separation between. No cut. No separation between. Transit reorganising. A body in action. Infinite variations. Disposing itself. In different ways. Different zones of this present. Questioning. Taking place. That moment. Constant. Zones. Outlinings. From the, of the. In-closures. No begin. Entities. No cut. Spaces. Constant. Articulation. Variations. Modulating. Spaces. Participating. Singularisation. Par-taking. Participating. Refering to time. No cut. Environments. Rearranging of. Carefully. With care. A careless care. A care without intention. Constant. Complex. Without end. A careless care. Without intention. Continuous present. Emanating. In action. Articulated present. Con-tact. Aesthetic thinking. Continuum. Possibility. Modulating. End. Conjugating. Partaking. In action. Adapting. The. Constant. Of. Rearrangement. To. End. This. With.
16.06.2021
Practice of Reading (Noticing Attraction) using Exploratory Essay (2) in parallel to Practice of Close Video Observation and Practice of Proximity Sphere (variation with camera)
Realizing. In between. Articulation. Singularization. Zones. Disposing. Modulating. Difference. No begin. Par-taking. Body, a body. Referring. Rearranging of. Difference. Consecutively. Action. Consequently. Continuum. Of being in touch. Con-tact. Continuum. Alternative. Contact. Continuum. Establishing. Constant. Specific contact. That moment. No cut. A body being. Own, continuing. Joining. A constant contact. Present. Continuum. Vague. Complex. Carefully. Care. Contact. Careless care. Constant. Conscious. Continuing. Occurring. Infinite. Continuing. Performance. Partaking. Dynamics. In touch. Touch. In transit. Intransitive. Articulation. Action, modulating. Continuing. Partaking. Being, will. Present. Continuum. Inevitable. A variety. Of touch. Being in touch. In-closures. In between. Conditions. Articulating. Inclosures. Participating entities. No cut. Articulated variations. Rearrangement. Alternative. Of being. Separation. As intrinsic. Care. Frames, modulating. Articulating, constitution. Questioning carefully, with care. Questioning. And. Joining. As participating. To. Referring. That, disposing. Itself, becoming. From, complex. Time. Arrangement. Inclosures. Constitution. Now, before, again. Itself, curiosity, in transit. Infinite in between. Complex, realizing, arrangement. Already present. Taking place, a variation in a different way. Infinite variations, rearrangements. A careless care. Without intention, silently without representation. Emerging present, of dynamics. Intransitive, without reason. Articulation, without targets, without justification. Now referring. Variety. Now this itself becoming. A different way. Constant as alternative to complex. Or. Contact. Outliners. Inevitable touch. Particularities. Already present. Separation, without representation. Sensing itself, complex present. Establishing contact. Singularization. Specification. Joining particularities. Partaking. No cut. No begin. No separation, begin. Articulated present. Itself becoming transit. Reorganization, rearrangement. Adapting. Partaking. A spontaneous care. Curiosity. Mutual care. Differentiation. Continuous present. Articulation. Possibility of touch. Realizing. Without end. No cut. Arising. As zones. Sensing. Mutedly. Present, present. Silently. Sensing itself. Without. Partaking. Without. Touch. Now, referring. Possibility of touch. Porously demarcated. Subtly, spaces in between. Contact. Conscious. Careless, care. Modulating. Frames. Conjugation.
18.06.2021
Practice of Reading (Noticing Attraction) using Exploratory Essay (2) in parallel to Practice of Close Video Observation and Practice of Proximity Sphere (variation with camera)
Contact. Continuum. Constant. Contact. Carefully. With care. Touch. Intending. Present. Pro-posing. Constant. Continuum. Own. Partaking. Rearranging. Care as an intrinsic part of partaking. Raw care, a careless care. Take care as an intransitive variety of action or being in action. Arising, occurring from sensing. Sensing. Attending. Motivations. Without motivations, without targets. Without de-ciding. Conditioning. Of self. Not reducible. Also constitutes contact. Trans-formative. Further into new areas beyond borders. Participating. Sensing. Appearing. Without de-ciding, without cutting up. A network of vibrating parts, of oscillating participants. An emergence of the mutual participants, an immanent, spontaneous, emergent, distributed in its origin and its activation, purpose without purposiveness. The resonant continuum of the vibrating joint parts. Unnoticeable. Emerges. Moving forth and back. Vibrating. Without ever retreating, where to go if there is no other place, no other process now. Tentative. Attentive. Proposing. Moving along the dynamics of resonance. Placing, qualifying. A decided self. Part-icularity. A selfless self. Yielding. Unnoticeable. Contradictions. Transformative. Tentative. Alternative. Appearing. Transforming. An expression of an articulated continuum, or the continual extended sense of self, of a porously, subtly, delimited self. Questioning the phenomena, the stability of self, questioning the identity, the operativity of the selves and their presence. Oscillating, vibrating, fluidity. Discontinuity. Proposing. Remaining. Realizing the current contact. Articulating it. Modulating it. The constitution of units and consequently of non units. No cut, no separation. Selves as zones, as frames, as particularities, as specifications, without breaking the plastic heterogeneity of dynamic wholeness. But articulating it, modulating it. A mutual care. Referring to time. Continuing. Before that, now this, but again. Dis-closure. Becoming place. Not reducible. Mutual conditioning. Without end. Immanent. Arising, appearing from sensing. Emergent. Without representation, without any other presence than the sensing itself. Participating in the continuity underlying any discontinuity, any difference. Care as manifestation, as an expression of the articulated continuum. A care without will-based, conscious intentionality, a care without intention. Confirmation of. Re-arrangement. Perception of touch. Modulation a constant, continually articulated present. A variety of action thus intrinsically careful. An articulated continuum. What appears, what appears, what emerges in and through the dynamic articulation of the extended. Between allowing and proposing, between accepting and altering. Minimal, tentative. A field of resonances nourishing the vibrations that enable it. Yielding. Co-vibrating participation in a shared field of relations. Continuing. Partaking. No cut, no separation. Attentive participation. Modulation of a constant articulated present. Almost un-noticable oscillation. A part-icularity. A tentative, attentive, pro-posing. Emergent. Place. Participation. An oscillation again. Difference. Continuing. Discontinuity. Bringing forth through surrendering, fruitful acceptance. Articulating it, modulating it. Without de-ciding. Without cutting up. A way of re-arranging. A selfless self. An emergent of the mutual co-conditioning. A constant and complex rearrangement of different zones of this continuous present, a way of rearranging. Noticing. Something else that does not abandon, does not transcend either the parts or the whole. Immanent. Subtly delimited. Intrinsically careful. Non-focused. Certain identity, certain possibility of being the same. Realising. Of continuing being the same. Of inevitable touch, appearing now. Again. Questioning identity. Constant. Stability. A careless care. Participating in the fluidity underlying any discontinuity, any difference. A care without intention, without goal, without end. Thinking. Arising. Realizing. Mutedly. Silently. A way of participating in a continuum. Emerging. The same body. A body as part, as body as subtly, porously demarcated zone. The continuously extended sense of self, of a subtly, porously, delimited self. Raw care, a careless care. Care as manifestation, as expression of the articulated continuum. Spontaneous care, mutual care. In-tending. Attending. Arising occurring from sensing. Vibrating. Resonance. Unnoticeable oscillation. The I is touched by the mutual recognition of the neighboring mediation. Out-linings. The self. In-closures. Constituted from the confirmation and reflection of the space. The same body. Is only the perception of touch generating the experience of a moment of touch? A constant and complex of rearrangement of different zones of this continuum present. Which influences change the strength of the osmotic condition of spheres? Yielding. A variety of action. Bringing forth. An attending rather than intending action. Modulated. Porously, subtly, delimited. A field of resonances nourishing the vibrations that enable it, silently, intimately, influencing the joinings of the joint parts and furthermore their vibrant matters. Tentative, attentive. Pro-posing. Co-vibrating. Moving back and forth. Bringing forth through surrendering, fruitful acceptance. An oscillation again. Intransit. Re-organising. Adapting itself, becoming. Selves as zones, as frames, as particularities, as specifications. Of a continuum.
12.07.2021
Text generated through by oscillating between Practice of Reading (Noticing Attraction) and Practice of Reading (Distillation) using Exploratory Essay 2 as source text, parallel to the Practice of the Nahbereich (Proximate Sphere) [variation - marking with camera] and Practice of Very Close Video Observation.
Questioning. Participating. Starting. Becoming. Contact. Dis-posing. Separation. Rearrangement. Articulated. Continuous present. Taking. Becoming. Self-modulating. Raw care. Accepting. Intention. Constitutes contact. Without. Shared. Dynamics. A network of vibrating parts, of oscillating participants. An intrinsic part. Co-participating vibration in a field of immanent resonances, as a continuous, adaptive, careful variation of sequences of forms and resonating vibrations. Variety of action. The state or condition of touching. Delimited self. Back. Perception of touch generating the experience of a moment of touch. Sedimented. Depending on the direction. Ex-tend. An articulated continuum. Noticing, sensing, primarily. Intimately attending and self-modulating. The articulation of minimal oscillating displacements. Participating in the fluidity underlying any discontinuity, any difference. Furthermore, the vibrant matters. Care as a manifestation, as an expression of the articulated continuum, of the continuously extended sense of self, a subtly porously delimited self. As an attentive participation in the resonant continuum. Subtle. Tentative. Attentive. Pro-posing. Oscillation. Rather as the proceeding of thinking. Proceed as pro-ceded. Yielding – bringing forth through surrendering, a fruitful acceptance, acceding proposition. To establish relationship, to bring together. Selfless self realizing purposiveness without purpose. Towards the making of connection without reaching towards, without reaching towards target or goal. Closer to communication – to make common.
Appearing. Of the articulation of the contingency of the actions of parts now disclosing themselves. Partake. Maintaining a certain identity, certain possibility of the being, of being the same. Of continuing being the same. A fine, subtle, almost unnoticeable oscillation, also between allowing and accepting. To make connection: connection – the state or fact of being (already) connected. A binding or joining together. Act of connecting: circle of relations, of intimate relations. Con-tact. With-touch. Without reaching towards target or goal. Resonances. Common. Variation. Into, in, and partire ‘to divide’. Part. Part-take. To have a part in. Joining. To pull apart – from se- ‘apart’ and parare ‘make ready, prepare’. Separation as preparation. As an attentive participation in the continuum, of co-vibrating joined parts. Participation. Separation. Co-constituting. Co-vibrating. Separation into parts as a condition for reconnection, for reparation, for restoring a sense of dynamic wholeness, a wholeness that in in-tact not intact. A variety of action that is intrinsically careful, non-focused on difference, but on the emergence enabled by the dynamics of a modulated, articulated continuum. No begin, thus begin, now referring to time. No cut, no separation – between past and present, between that moment and this one, between before that and now this. But again, a modulation of a constant, articulated present.
Arising, occurring from sensing. Mutedly, silently, without representation. Without deciding, without cutting up. Neighbouring mediation as a testimony of the other, or the non-self, of the counterpart. Ex-pression of the dynamic articulation of the parts, without ex-pressing their singularities but something else. Continuing. Co-vibrating joined parts. Modulation. Moving forwards and back, proceed as pro-ceded, moving forward without ever abandoning the resonant sphere of the articulated continuum, remaining always a part. Co-vibrating participation. Moving forwards through surrendering. Fruitful acceptance, acceding proposition. Allowing. Different but not additional, a transformative but not transcendent difference. Pro-posing. Sensing. Of the articulation of the contingency of the parts now disclosing themselves. Simultaneously joining and separating, joining through separation. Maintaining certain identity. Certain possibility of being the same. Separation as preparation, creating the conditions for recreation, reorganization of the common. Participating in the fluidity. In touch. Circle of relations, of intimate relations. To establish relationship, to bring together. Almost unnoticeable. To join or to unite, at the same time as to share or to divide out. A careful attention, an almost permanently latent action. Noticing, sensing, primarily. Self-modulating. Separation. Immanent resonances. Articulating it, modulating it. No touch, thus, as starting point, but participation. With-tact. The same body. With-touch. A body in action, a body in transit, reorganizing itself. Disposing itself in different ways. In-touch. Constant and complex rearrangement of different zones. Else, raw care. A transformative but not transcendent difference. A mutual care, a care remaining from the joinings. No cut, no separation. Arising - occurring from sensing. A body as part. A body as a subtly, porously demarcated zone, a body in action, a body in transit. Reorganizing itself, disposing itself in different ways. An attending rather than intending action. A careful attention. Articulating it, modulating it: an articulation of minimal, oscillating displacements. An articulated continuum, of vibrant matters. A modulation of a constant, articulated present. Of co-vibrating, joined parts. No cut. Between accepting and altering. Subtly, porously. Moving forward without ever abandoning the resonant sphere. Giving up, without ever retreating. Where to go if there is no other place, no other process, now. A constant and complex rearrangement of different zones of this continuous present, a way of rearranging, of taking place, of becoming place in a different way. Contact: in touch, with touch, with tact. With touch, in touch, in tact, intact. An unbroken whole. Without de-ciding, without cutting up. Taking apart, again and again. Redistribution of the common through partaking, through taking a-part. Parts appearing to themselves, to those endowed with the agency of the co-constituting presences - for themselves, of enabling parts and whole to appear to themselves, anew. A touch without direct consequences. Fields, surfaces, systems, can be in relation with each other, as parallel existences. The contingency of the parts now disclosing themselves. Beyond the borders, a body as subtly, porously demarcated. Further into new areas beyond borders. The same body, the body as part, the body as subtly, porously demarcated. Breaking continuity. Questioning the identity between the operativity of the selves and their presence, or maybe better, more fundamentally, participating in the fluidity underlying any discontinuity, any difference.
13.07.2021
Text generated through by oscillating between Practice of Reading (Noticing Attraction) and Practice of Reading (Distillation) using Exploratory Essay 2 as source text, parallel to the Practice of the Nahbereich (Proximate Sphere) [variation - marking with camera] and Practice of Very Close Video Observation.
The way I entered this practice - resonates. How are my senses mobilized? The sphere is constituted by a certain mobilization of my senses. The constitution of this sphere, this is what resonates. How are my senses mobilized in order to constitute this sphere? What is the balance of the senses – the visual, the tactile, the olfactory, the tactile? It depends on the inclination of my head. I notate it as, I notice it as, I notate it as - I notice it as the constitution of this sphere. Sounding. Sounding. The sounding of my breath would extend the allowance of something. What I call the constitution of the - what I liked was – immediate sphere. Immediately - in terms of without taking, without needing to make a connection in between. This threshold of rubbing up against habits of being in the world - it is the confrontation with the shock of that, the confrontation of the shock of certain habits. Thinking how is this mode different? A sense of where I am going. I am able to touch, to touch making a small movement, a kind of systematic attunement. How do I do this in moving? To make a connection in between. Immediacy – which takes me some time. Come off the path. It was a vertical register – it was a dropping in, a dropping into the world in a sense. But there is no reason to move almost. I know. I know it is a hybrid of pre-planning and automatic habits. How is this mode different? It was a vertical register – it was a dropping in, a dropping into the world in a sense. A really different kind of stillness, a less self-conscious stillness. I realize that I need time to digest. The depth of attention was limited in my own practicing of it, in what I am curious about. I am speculating though – this was not my experience. Do you think, I am wondering now, am I departing from my direct experiences? But I am wondering if the sound can be present, but not in a reaching way? There was a moment on the walk when the sun touched me – so it wasn’t so much that I was seeing the sun. I am speculating though, this was not my experience. Self-contained – the proximate edge of the body felt almost enclosing. A very different kind of movement, close to my body but not introspective. Very proximate to the body but not going into. All these very tiny shifts were unfolding in so many options. Everything else is placed inside it. I never used the word deviation before, but there comes another deviation – what comes in, I don’t know? The constitution of this proximate sphere is a condition in terms of once you are there, then there is a shift that needs to be maintained. The area of interest was much more close to my body, I stayed near but not going into. There was light coming onto my body but I did not only realize it with my eyes. The difference between the eyes reaching towards something or receiving. The place where the air was touching my skin. This I is not an egocentric I – it opens up, it becomes a medium to define this sphere, and for me what is relevant in the act of perceiving, what is in my experience, is this sphere which needs me as a point in the world to be defined. But this me, as this point in the world, is not the focus of my attention, but this sphere needs this point operatively in the world to exist. I continue with some movement and all of a sudden the immediateness of the sphere and some sensuous qualities came back and it started to fall into place.
26.03.2021
Text generated through the Practice of Reading (Distillation) using Conversation-as-Material transcripts as source text.
The edge was much more soft. And still something happened on the physical level of gentleness, in allowing myself, being allowed, not even allowing myself. It is happening, a chain of things happening. Thinking how is this mode different? A gentleness of being there, a negotiation. And also physically of joints articulating themselves differently. So they must find a kind of systematic attuning with one another. A feeling of moving into things, a quality of this moving into, of continuously moving into places. Without needing to, to make a connection in between. The balance of senses. Balance. The gentleness, the gentleness allows you to be, allows the constitution of the gentleness, allows the being there. I wonder. Exploration, exploring, ex– out and plurare – to weep, to cry. Through a certain mobilization. Rubbing up against.
Not connected to moving into. At the extremities where it was most attended to, touching. Today I had to move to form the thoughts differently. I could not write at all. To receive something, and what it is. To allow, or is it just happening? Layers of different thoughts happening, different languages - different. Being in-formed. I get information, digest information. To fall in place, coupled differently, again. Proximate. Immediate. Gradient. Receive. Softness. Unevenness. Allowed. Enabled. Time to digest. My capacity for access into a space of aesthetic action. Encountering from different angles. Allowing to be.
Constitution of gentleness. The deviations also. Everything. Something happens. Choosing. It started to fall into place. Disappearance. Some sensuous quality. A possibility. Outline. A possible violation. Co-constitutes. Playing games. Going off and playing. Evolution. Or even that it retrospectively a sense of structure to what has been. Accepted as belonging to this. Congruent in a way. A bar. A kiosk. How to choose again? There is a coming alive in the moment, the aspect of releasing at the same time arising. And then this release through movement, it is not a projected movement. It definitely includes a specific knowledge, of knowing what I need to do now. That edge was rendered more porous. The deviations, another deviation.
And the stains on the ground. Weather-wise and seasonally. Just being able to go to the floor, this feels contingent on much bigger agencies. Coming alive. Recognition of so many possibilities. And this is something that appears again. Wondering how thinking becomes differently possible within different circumstances. What seemed to emerge was the interplay between a sense of orientation and a sense of disorientation. A contradictory vector between establishing and moving, and what multidirectional physical movement does with it. Enabling a kind of fluidity. The line between these different modes was subtle. There is a coming alive. Releasing and at the same time arising. It starts to steam up and thickens. Space becomes a place and this is an exciting feeling. This breakdown in the classification of what is ‘my’. What I noticed was that I almost needed, no, I found, that certain kinds of micro-movements or other kinds of movements facilitated my movements. The egocentric I opens up and becomes a medium. There is a hyper-activation of subjectivity but subjectivity as egocentric experience disappears. It is through me, but I do not appear. The smell suddenly activated a different kind of stillness, a much less self-conscious stillness. Very subtle, but very present. I stayed near but not going into. The feeling of something, something about the felt sensation. Something of a dropping in, it was a vertical register. It was a dropping in, a dropping into. It stayed near, but not going into. There was no reason to move almost. It was almost like my attentional threshold was at the limit of my body, within the body but not so self-contained. A zone with spatial thickness. That edge might have to shimmer. I disappear. Taking. The gentleness, the gentleness that allowed the constitution of the gentleness, allowed the being there.
18.05.2021
Text generated through Practice of Reading (Distillation) (using Conversation-as-Material Distillation as source material) parallel to the Practice of Explorative Drawing and of Material Encounter.
Implies a change in texture. A contradictory vector between establishing the Nahbereich or constituting or co-constituting the Nahbereich. In moving. Listening or hearing and everything that was activated in listening and hearing. And I also had this question of how much is movement needed. But I could realise it with my eyes.
I realise. The front and the back and the sides. Orient – as in arrangement. A different kind of choosing. This feeling of moving into things. The score is a tool that co-constitutes something, but it is not the only one. When I accepted the possibility of close and mid range, then this was positive for me inhabiting this. Momentum that arises from movement giving rise to movement. Still, everything else is placed inside it. More estranged in a way, a change, a change of texture.
Something comes back. The focus shifts to another one. A practice of localising proximity, or delineating proximity, or constituting proximity. The investigation was to do with whether it is possible to reach with my fingers, with my physical body, the edge of my shadow. What do I allow to happen, do I decide to allow or is it just happening? And by becoming aware of it do I allow for? Things on the surface of the eye calling me to move. What does it mean to hold back? The motivation for the investigation was micro. Tuning in. Dropping in. Dropping into. In-formed. In-formation. That edge might have to shimmer – beyond the limit of the body’s proximate sphere. It stayed near but not going into. Maybe I was feeling doubtful or lacking confidence that the micro movement was sufficient. The line between these different modes was subtle. Not wanting to do something that felt expressive. Something to do with a shifting sense of gravity, and the shifting of the head. A lowering. A coming alive in the moment. The aspect of releasing and yet at the same time arising. All of a sudden, the immediateness of the sphere.
Something of a dropping in, it was a vertical register. It was a dropping in, a dropping into.
20.05.2021
Text generated through Practice of Distillation using Conversation-as-Material transcript as source material parallel to the Practice of Explorative Drawing and of Material Encounter.
1 Possible. Experience. Capacity. Condensed. Mediated. Into. Incorporates. Now. Probably. Enter. Experience. Unfolding. Spoken. Language. Medium. Mode. Materialised. Situation. Easy. Presence. Focused. Wondering. Aboutness. Contact. Expanding. Drawn. To. Object. Create. Exercise. Constitution. Presence. Being. Shaping. Nameless. Situations. Tuning. Mute. Experience. Rubbing.
2 It was really a physical sensation turning into an image. The place where the air was touching my skin. Spaciousness then appeared, or something of a space. Maybe not spaciousness - space appeared, and then it became spacious. The felt sensation of sound within the proximate sphere. Accepting it as being part of my structure. The continuity of space is actually always happening, this impression of continuity. This transition between the inner and outer. What is this becoming aware of? As belonging to. I had a feeling of it expanding. Where the edge was much more soft. This kind of lively lightness – a quality of lightness but within the materiality of the paper was really striking. To feel the sound of thought and my breath arise. Does it arise some place in my body?
3 Alternative. Shapes. Perceptual. Range. Shaping. Listening. Inclination. Shimmer. Abandoning. Continuing. Shimmering. Touching. Forming. Flight.
4 The question of touching, of the with. Not as a solid as it seems to be, and it seems to be the most solid thing. There are all these nameless situations or moments that are not graspable yet. How do you modify the frame implicitly? As being part of my structure. Articulated sounds that touch the stone. Not to bring to language. But to take a pencil to produce articulated signs, touching the stone. To keep the fundamental continuity of the mode of doing. Immediate because it also relates to the question of how, how are my senses mobilised in order to constitute this sphere. It depends of the inclination of my head. Language unfolding from experience. Making. In the same key or texture.
5 Happens. Investigation. Listen. Necessary. Stays. Dropping. In.
6 The sense of muteness, it was not silent. It stayed local to the body, very proximate to the body. How is this mode different? There was something of a dropping in, it was a vertical register. It stayed near, but not going into. Where is my interest going? This felt different, it felt a cognitive operation, but not a linguistic operation. It is expanding, I had a feeling of it expanding, at the edges of the space, emerging.
7 Foregrounded. Letting go. Density. Capacity. First. Beyond. Sensation. Encounter. Shimmer. Shift. It. But. Fluctuate.
16.06.2021
Text generated through:
1, 3, 5, 7. Reading (Noticing Attraction) using Conversation-as-Material [Distillation] in parallel to Drawing|Material Encounter.
2, 4, 6. Reading (Distillation) using Conversation-as-Material [Distillation] in parallel to Drawing|Material Encounter.
Relating. Noticing. Spaciousness. Shimmer. Part. Spacious. Capacity. Incorporate. Somehow. Something. Moving. Abandoning. Moment. Particular. Perception. Correspondence. Coincide. Letting. Noting. Coming. Thinking. Stillness. Shifts. Continue. Sounding.1
There is this threshold. There was something of a dropping in. The continuity of space or where the space is actually happening – this impression of continuity. It stayed near but not going into. The experience of space just through a piece of paper is enough. But at same time realising that there is the other and there is a coming together. A distributed field of agencies. They coincide. Even endless in a way.2
Flickery. Lively. Concrete. Density. Perceive. Eyes. Resonating. Sense. Becoming. Narrowing.3
This mute quality of presence, a material, physical presence. Here, there was something very much to do with letting go of the sense of the history. Endless in a way. There was a kind of perceptual flashing. I am also wondering what is its presence there. Not to bring to language. There is a shift there. It is not so much physical health, perceptual health, but cognitive health. How perceptual capacity is strengthened or diminished by certain ways of using it. Not as solid as it seems to be. A way of acting, a disposition.4
Diffusing. Thinking. Appearing. Shapes. Different. Articulated. Mediate. Embodied. Example. Continuing. Inclination. Stay. With. Operation. Movement. Information. Condensed. Attuning. Confrontation. Nameless. Modify. Stillness. Mobilization. Intention. Discern. Realized. Coincide.5
How much is movement needed? All these nameless situations or moments that are not graspable yet. There are a lot of growing processes going on that I cannot name. Overwhelmed by all this density, I almost cannot find any words. Becoming aware of, becoming connected with, getting in touch with. This threshold of rubbing up against habits of being in the world. Sound can be present, but not in a reaching way. The egocentric I opens up and becomes a medium. Again, there was something of the dropping in, it was a vertical register. It was a dropping in, a dropping into the world in a sense. That edge was rendered porous. Not forcing language to be a grasping tool, but a touching tool.6
Continuity. Unfolding. Discern. Area. Smell. Forming. Stay near. Threshold. Resonating. Spheres. Spaciousness. Shifts. Muteness. Listening. Breath. Medium. Density. Extremities. Capacity. Hands. Blind. Becoming.7
A zone with spatial thickness – where that edge might have to shimmer. What do I follow and where does it come from? I did not realize it with my eyes I also realized it with my hands, with the front and the back and the sides. Because my eyes are conditioned to operating in a certain way. To move with. Moving with a distributed field of agencies. It is like the stone – one focused condensed image, one physical image that I had. It is expanding. The attempt to form words. It stayed near but not going into. I let words appear. It was not about. Like a mental note. Overwhelmed by all this density – and I understood that this is a momentum that I can grasp. Which takes some time – there is this threshold. Unable to judge, to touch making a small movement. It depends on the inclination of my head. It stayed near but not going into.8
Incorporate. Listening. Balance. Ears. Possibilities. Mobilize. Functionality. Perception. Investigation. Conditioned. Reinforcing. Dissimilar. Informing. Different. Capacity. Operation. Organ. Operation. Engagement. Appropriating. Encounter. Foreground. Impulse. Shimmer. In mind. Spaciousness. Receive. Endless. Wider.9
This mute quality of presence, of the physical material presence. Language unfolding from that experience, in the same key or texture as that experience. How the language shapes the way that I am, or how I am present in a way. The presence of this – how does it shape my presence? Only arising through. It did not come as something that I could imagine.10
Acting. Thinking. Withness. Form. Forming. Mobilizing. Relation. Now. Wondering. Withness. The stone. Constitution. Stone. Spheres. Mouth. Scent. Moment. Other agencies. Withness. Disappears.11
Egocentric experience disappears - I disappear in the moment. For making possible a certain way of relation. I wasn’t appearing. In terms of becoming in touch. This was within my proximate sphere. There are different forms of presence. Defined by a way of acting, by a disposition. There are all these nameless situations or moments which are not graspable yet. There is this quality in the forming of the sounding while talking, and I can feel being here with you interacting with the thought and at the same time there as this stone and this stone in front of me, and I am also wondering what is its presence there? This language-with, thinking-with, unfolding. And I wonder, what is this mouth, this tongue, forming. The presence of this, how does it shape my presence? The stone is so material, so concrete, and so dense in a way. The material is resonating – this moment of becoming. Even endless, in a way. And then there is just this paper in front of me, with lines on it. This materiality of the stone. And the felt sensation of sound. The mute quality of presence. A material, physical presence which was shaping somehow, it is shaping. That edge might have to shimmer. The presence of this, how does it shape my presence? This shimmer, the shimmering of it. The sense of giving time to something, giving time to something with a certain kind of engagement. There are lines on a paper, or maybe even two lines. But it is somehow an engrained process. This kind of lively lightness, a quality of lightness but within the materiality of the paper. What did the stone make me be? An object of perception. Funnily enough, the stone was now for me a completely mute object. I had a feeling of it expanding. Mute. It was more the space emerging.12
Doing. Distributed. Relating. Appear. Feeling. Condition. Density. Stillness. A note. No tendency. The sounding. Enough. Stillness. Expanding. Stillness. Inclination. Wondering. Sounding. Wondering. Immediately. Or not. Related. Needed.13
Overwhelmed by all this density. A variety of interaction. It was a kind of perceptual flashing. Both possibilities are there. A lively lightness but within the materiality of the paper. Thinking about it in a different way. Flickery and lively. To observe the border. Perceptual flashing. This impression of continuity. This moment of becoming. This coming together, realizing. Because my eyes are conditioned.14
18.06.2021
Text generated through a sequence of Ecologies in Action:
1, 3, 5, 7, 9, 11, 13 Practice of Reading (Noticing Attraction) using Conversation-as-Material [Distillation Part 1] in parallel to Practices of Drawing and of Material Encounter.
2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 12, 14 Practice of Reading (Conversation Distillation Part 1) using Conversation-as-Material [Distillation Part 1] in parallel to Practices of Drawing and of Material Encounter.
Grounds. Grounding. Moving into. Actualizing. Thoughts. Allow. Hold back. Being. Softness. Digest. Release. Fluid. Softness. Couples. Immediateness. Choosing. Conditioned. Structure. Gentleness. Nahbereich. Aliveness. There is a coming alive in the moment that creates the conditions for thinking somehow. There is a somehow a fluidity. Different kinds of physical processes. I can allow myself to be there. A different kind of thoughtful thinking action, processes start and couple back. Then movement is happening, a kind of stretching out. Also in terms of what makes me move, it stimulates my curiosity. It is also a feeling of moving into things, it is a different kind of choosing. What seemed to emerge was this interplay between a sense of orientation and a sense of disorientation. Not so much to do with the interplay of orientation and disorientation but between the influence or pull of the environment and internal needs. These things on the surface of my eye calling me to move. The impulse to move, the impulse of curiosity, does not necessarily come from the matter of the body somehow. The impulse to move does not really come from movement. It is also a feeling of moving into things. A space of relaxation, this pulse of close and of mid range. To lower the eyes to the ground. It was this feeling of moving into things one after the other. A kind of yes/no quality in the practice. Highly present, highly sensory engagement but at the same time keeping it contained within a certain sphere of experience in a way. Something to do with the capacity of moving the body, or this capacity between movement and stillness. And the word is diving; the start of the start is the diving.
Happening. Forces. Emerge. Calling. Matters. Shapes. Support. Drawing. Continuity. Movement. Language. Movement. Contained. Conditioning one another. Consequence. But what does it allow. Movement, many movements, but foremost movement, like a shifting transforming, transforming on many levels. The micro-movements of the head following these figures. The indirectness of this kind of thinking. It happens again and again and again and it deepens, it helps, it happens. On light and on attention to the light. And continue, more than resonating there, resonate from there. The emergence of felt, rhythmical qualities that intrigue one another, so things start to swing with one another, begin to swing. This is a condition of a certain kind of thinking. This notion of the common is there, meaning the common freely interchanged. It is a common which is not at the beginning there, it is a common which is happening. That only exists when it happens, if it happens. The chronological aspect of cause and effect felt complicated, more like a web of relations. This sense of holding back, holding back in order to let something emerge, holding back something, withdrawal, holding back, withdrawal. The removal of something or the shifting of something that suddenly brings the background into the fore, or the periphery somehow into more focused attention.
Stillness. Sliding. Withdrawal. Mutual. Carried. Holding. Sliding. Resonating. Moves away. Common. Calling. A coming together but not through association, this mutual emergence creating the conditions for the other. So starting with this very micro-movement, when something moved and to follow that. And the movement of the frame allows or even lubricates a more fluid sense of connections. There is a movement in continuity. This kind of shimmering on my retina. What supports or carries the thinking-doing – carried or taken or moved by a momentum that I am not fully in control of somehow. Reciprocity – this reciprocity of giving and receiving. Active – from actus. A doing, from the root *ag – to drive, draw out, force or move. Dive – to descend or plunge. At first, sometimes they seemed to touch each other or have some points of coincidence. This mutual emergence – each creating the conditions for the other. And continue, more than resonating there, resonate from there. An overwhelm of different calls or possibilities. Shifting, transforming – a kind of interweaving of emergence between the different parts. A coming together but not through association. The preconditions for exploring was establishing a sense of comfort. Something about coming back to this space of sensori-motor focus, that was within the Nahbereich actually, within that specific containment. It was almost like being held within a certain fluid atmosphere, allowing the distraction part of the environment to be sort of held back. Staying only to the thought that arose specific to that moment, and not pursuing it somehow – letting it come, letting it be. There is this liminal sense – almost an out-of-timeness in a way. Not being distracted by everything that is happening, but rather being contained or even protected from distractions. The indirectness of this kind of thinking. I noticed moments of disorientation. I appreciate this in between zones of being orientated and being disorientated. Up from under and carried over, there is something of a quality of support in the action that enabled a sense of thinking. This pulse of close and mid range – a different threshold. To lower the focus of the eyes to the ground. Beginning from the basis of establishing this condition of highly present, but not distracted. Entering into what, conditioning one another. Let reading rest as an activity.
Being held. Gentleness – something happened on the physical level of gentleness. It was almost like being held within a certain fluid atmosphere. Allowing the distraction part of the environment to be sort of held back. And then there is this moment when it happens, but still you question yourself on how to enter. It was a deep pleasure and this deep pleasure also allowed you to move on and maybe to let the diving happen.
Forms. Shimmering. Perceiving. Variation. Back. Disorientation. Dismissed. Constitute. Acceptance. Sphere. Belonging. Couples back. Exploring. Thoughtful thinking. Continuous moving. Sufficiently connected. Accepting what there is to move on. The disappearance of one thing. Ex-ploring. An overwhelm of different calls or possibilities. This kind of shimmering on my retina. There is a coming alive in the moment that creates conditions for thinking – releasing and at the same time arising, a release into and something that is uprising. A kind of momentum between a grounding experience, a settling experience, and then some of the practices had an agitating quality, stirring in a sense really, a bit excitable. There is somehow a fluidity, the softness of the ground, this unevenness, this aliveness. Then coming back to a stiller sense. Gentleness – something happened on the physical level of gentleness. It produced or constituted a gentleness of being there, and also of joints articulating themselves differently. And a feeling of moving into things. It is a different kind of choosing. The excitement starts to happen when there are possibilities that are not yet actualized – then different processes start. The constitution of gentleness allowed the being there or the constitution of different directions that could continue after the gentleness. There was a feeling of moving into things one after another – a different kind of choosing, continuously moving. Accepting what there is to move on. A quality of reaching out in the key of perceiving or letting in. Receiving something. Move into. Calling. Connect. Tactile.
What do I allow to be? What do I allow to happen? What does it mean to hold back? To bring up from under and to carry over – this is a condition of a certain kind of thinking. Constitute – to enter into the formation as a necessary part. This just rightness of being sufficiently supported. There is somehow a fluidity in a textual space – a textorium really. This kind of thinking has a continuity which is sustained, so sustained by the highly sensitive, sensori-motor self or sensori-motor body and environment. Sitting, even lying. A coming together but not through association, more like a web of relations. There was somehow a range of physical movement that became more possible, that became very fluid. The line between these different modes was subtle. The sense of mutuality complicates the idea of following. Reciprocity – this reciprocity of giving and receiving. To not intend, to unbind, untie, unfasten. To un-congeal, to un-freeze, to loosen or relax. Capacity. Collapse. Movement between. The removal of something or the shifting of something that suddenly brings the background into the fore.
What is the balance of the senses? It depends on the inclination of my head. I have to go down. To touch making a small movement. This constitution of the immediate sphere. Without needing to do an action in between. The transition into takes some time. The deficit of my habitual way of being. This threshold of rubbing up against habits. So much of that is automatic, the shock of habit. So much a hybrid of preplanning and automatic habits. The tuning in, the dropping into - it is a vertical register. The proximate edge, enclosing. The impulse to move. Getting stuck at the reach of the arm. Smell activated a different kind of stillness. A much less self conscious stillness. Not introspective, it stayed near but not going into. To stay where I am. How much is movement needed? Tiny shifts unfolding so many options. Not only realizing with the eyes but with the hands. Overwhelmed by all this density. The sounding of the breath extends the proximate. Adapting. Sounding. Where is the interest going? What do I follow and where does it come from? This attentional threshold, this immediate sphere. Not a categorical rejection of listening or hearing. Can you say it in other words? Listening, hearing, my memory is not without sounds. This sphere that I was trying to keep. Is this departing from direct experience? The eyes reaching or receiving. At the level of the organ of the ear. The felt sensation of sound. The reverberation. The immediate sphere has a spatial thickness - the density of this experience. Between rubbing the finger and the thumb.
12.07.2021
Text generated through by oscillating between Practice of Reading (Noticing Attraction) and Practice of Reading (Distillation) using Conversation Distillation through Marking as source text, parallel to the Practice of Exploratative Drawing.
Proximate. Mobilized. Naming. Fluctuate. Common. Eyes. Incorporate. Inhabit. Structure. Movement. Moving. Sliding. Choosing. Breeze. Enabled. Awareness. Reverberating. Shimmering. Withdrawal. Arise. Tendency. Periphery. Happening. Silent. Territory. Collapse. Expand. Attune. A kind of systematic attuning with one another. All these options of coming into. It is a common which is not at the beginning there, a common which is happening, but only exists if it happens, when it happens. Again, the flight of thought, a sense of noticing when it goes into thought – why does it have to go into thought, why can it not just stay with it? Beginning from the basis of establishing this condition of highly present but not distracted. I had the feeling like it is common, but it is an unknown common. And the thinking coming by, conditioned by, and as a consequence of the action. This can be the result of self-centred, target-oriented, will-based action or/and can be the result of a distributed field of agencies. There is a variety of modes of interaction in the medium of language when we think like this. Interweaving of emergence between the different parts – a coming together, but not through association. The mutual emergence creating the conditions for the other. It stayed near but not going into. To lower the eyes to the ground.
Dive. Descend. Curious. Continue. Transform. Resonating. Fluctuate. Shimmering. Merging. Sound. Swing. Exploring. Diving. Starting. Localizing. Delineating. Tuning. Moving. Circling. Scent. Encounter. Transforming. To keep the fundamental continuity of the mode of doing and not to go into another rigidity, another functionality, another operability. How to enter, the question really, how to enter? How to enter into what? The question of touching, of the with. I wasn’t appearing. In an aesthetic experience there is a kind of paradox, which is not, but it seems to be a paradox – there is a heightened activation of subjectivity but subjectivity as egocentric experience disappears. The preconditions for exploring was establishing a sense of comfort. What seemed to emerge was this interplay between a sense of orientation and a sense of disorientation. Actualizing – the excitement starts to happen when there are possibilities that are actualized. It is a different kind of choosing. There was this feeling of coming into things one after another, a different kind of choosing, continually moving. Accepting what there is to move on. The indirectness of this kind of thinking. Letting in or welcoming. A thinking that is to do with allowing thinking to be thought. The softness of the ground, this unevenness, the aliveness of the floor. All the processes of thinking, arise spontaneously out of something else, even out of nowhere. The chronological aspect of cause and affect felt complicated, more like a web of relations. Mutuality complicates the idea of following. Reciprocity – this reciprocity of giving and receiving. Up from under and carried over. This mutual emergence, each creating the conditions for the other. The notion of the common is there, meaning the common, freely interchanged. The ‘call of’ drawing me – as I moved closer it moved away; as I reached towards it, it moves away. Something to do with trying to touch the limit of the shadow.
Receiving. Consequence. Complicates. Light. Deepens. Not pursuing. Constitute. Floated. Relax. Unbind. Frame. And the quality of thinking that was coming from the action, never went off. Carried or taken or moved by a momentum that I am not fully in control of somehow. The removal of something or the shifting of something that suddenly brings the background into the fore. And it happens again and again and again, and it deepens, it helps to, it happens. And the circling around. There is this liminal sense – almost an out-of-time-ness in a way. Carried or taken or moved by a momentum that I am not fully in control of somehow. The gentleness, the gentleness allowed you to be, or allowed the constitution of gentleness, the constitution of gentleness allowed the being there, or the articulation of different directions that could continue afterwards, through the gentleness. There was this feeling of moving into things one after another.
Reciprocity – this reciprocity of giving and receiving. A kind of momentum between a grounding experience, a settling experience, and then some of the practices had an agitating feeling in a sense, stirring in a sense really, even a bit excitable. And then coming back to a stiller sense. Sometimes they seemed to touch each other, or to have some points of coincidence. Swing. Ground. Separate. Shaped. Belonging. Pleasure. Sensation. necessary. Paradox. Dimensions. Change. Bottom. Alter. Constitute. Transform. Focus. Non-intention. This I is not an egocentric I. It opens up, it becomes a medium for me to define this sphere, and for me, what is relevant in the act of perceiving, what is in my experience, is this sphere which needs me as a point in the world, to be defined. But this me as a point in the world is not my focus of attention. It is through me but I do not appear.
I could realize that the sounding of my breath would extend the proximate sphere or the moment. It kind of related to another dimension. The movement of attending to the movement of something else, somehow enabled the movement of the thinking and the speaking, and in the stillness there is a shift in tone. This relation between the moment where I receive something and the moment where I actively move into. What I allow to be? What do I allow to happen? What does it mean to hold back? What I was curious was whether the proximate sphere has to be activated in experience much more as a zone, with spatial thickness, to include more of the interior experiences of the body. But this zone might also fluctuate beyond the limits of the body’s proximate sphere.
It is getting stuck somewhere in my body. Something about coming back to this sense of sensori-motor focus, being held within a certain fluid atmosphere, allowing the distraction part of the environment to be sort of held back. Really a contradictory sense of feeling deeply connected to the environment – this liminal sense, almost an out-of-time-ness. The attempt to form words, since I know that this is coming, this is part of what we do, was already engrained in the exercise. So I can then hold on to it.
Up from under and carried over. There is something of a quality of support in the action which enables this sense of thinking – a duality between a sense of intense sensori-motor awareness and a high level of connection with the environment, and on the other hand avoiding the wider sphere of this environment. Skin. Sphere. Thing. Thinking. Structure. Untie. Sliding. Falling. Taken along. Grasping. Focus. Naming. Letting. Alternatives. Present. What is an aesthetic use of language? The indirectness of this kind of thinking. A thinking which is to do with allowing the thinking to be thought, or the process of thinking to arise spontaneously out of something else, even out of nowhere. What if when we move into the medium of language, what if we begin to actually think in the medium of language continuing doing the same. The realization of a tendency to reflect on practice arises – on light and on attention to the light. To bring the eyes down.
13.07.2021
Text generated through by oscillating between Practice of Reading (Noticing Attraction) and Practice of Reading (Distillation) using Conversation Distillation through Marking as source text, parallel to the Practice of Exploratative Drawing.