Comfort and Anxiety Management
Her initial severe anxiety levels (9 in Workshop 1) dropped significantly by
Workshop 2 (1) and stayed really low subsequently.
Regardless of the slight increase in anxiety in workshop 4 (6), she no longer
considered these nerves as a purely negative trait. She acknowledges that a
healthy amount of nerves could even be beneficial for her performance.
Comfort levels were generally irregular, as it naturally takes time to fully integrate these ideas into a performance
Mistake Acceptance and Self-Criticism
Her capacity to embrace minor errors grew from 3 in Workshop 1 to 8 in Workshop 3, hence improving post-performance
analysis. Nevertheless, self-criticism during performances remained a challenge; her lowest acceptance score was 3 in Workshop 4. This suggests that she still struggled with self-criticism on stage even if she could reflect more rationally after the performance.
Overall Reflection on Progress
S’s experience shows good progress on how she handles pressure and self-
evaluation.
She managed to transform her perception of what performance should be by
interpreting these opportunities as a learning experience rather than a judgmental moment, which is a great step in the right direction.
She made substantial progress in her overall confidence, proving that self-
compassion and a strong resilient mind can go a long way.
Her ability to disregard mistakes during performance oscillated throughout the
workshops, indicating that this could be something to work on.
Regardless of her self reported progress during the workshops, S relates that the concert was probably her worse performance in the entirety of the the times she performed. She attributes this to having changed the piece last minute, as she was nervous to play J. S. Bach. This highlights the oscillating nature of progress, and how easily a musician can revert back to old patterns of thinking that may hinder performance.
She also points out (in her general thoughts about the workshops) that the
experience was so psychologically difficult that she didn’t have the courage to
watch back the recording right away. However, a month later, she acknowledges that disappointing performances can happen and are natural, and she can finally watch the recording with ease and acceptance, showing great improvements in self-compassion.
Perception of Success (4):
S rates her performance a 4, which is relatively low. This aligns with her journal entry describing her nervous state.
Comfort Level (3):
The low comfort score indicates a significantly high discomfort while playing. The student reported being unable to relax, feeling physically rigid, and mentally distracted. She also mentions that playing for her peers had a negative effect on her nerves.
Pre-performance Anxiety (9):
S reports an extremely high anxiety before starting. The student mentioned cold hands and discomfort, showing a strong physiological reaction to stress.
Mistake Acceptance (During) (4):
Minor imperfections had a negative impact on her experience. The student reported that intonation issues made their mental state worse, and heightened her anxiety.
Mistake Acceptance (After) (3):
A score of 3 indicates that S is highly critical of her performance, indicating difficulty in accepting her mistakes during the performance.
Reflection
This was clearly a difficult experience for S. With high levels of anxiety she couldn't find a way to manage them. This led her to feel a substantial level of discomfort. After the performance she had a hard time accepting that it didn't go as she woud like. These are signs that S has a lot of room for improvement and that the workshops could help her cope.
Comfortable to play for a public: (5)
S feels somewhat neural about playing for a public. A rating of 5 suggests that she does not have overwhelming anxiety or a high degree of confidence, but is situated in the middle instead. She might be uncertain if the performance will go her way or not.
Comfortable with the idea of making a mistake on stage: (7)
S is fairly comfortable with making mistakes on stage. A rating of 7 implies that she recognizes that even though mistakes are undesirable, they are part of the process.
However, they may still be a minor level of discomfort if they happen.
Excited with an opportunity to play: (5)
A rating of 5 suggests S had a moderate level of excitement when presented with an opportunity to play. For her performance doesn’t elicit strong feelings of anxiety or of confidence.
Ability to recover mentally after a bad performance: (6)
S’s ability to recover mentally from a performance that didn’t go so well is relatively good.
It may not be easy to do so, but she is able to regain focus and still use the experience to her advantage regardless of the negative feelings she might have towards it.
Comfortable with watching a video of a performance that didn’t go as well as she wanted: (9)
S is extremely confident about watching a video of a performance that didn’t go as well as she would like. This proves she is confident enough to look at the recording as a learning opportunity, rather than feeling discouraged by it. This shows a big commitment to improvement.
Nervousness with a performance in a week of a piece you’re comfortable with: (5)
S experiences a moderate amount of anxiety when faced with an opportunity to play a piece she’s familiar with. She likely experiences some level of nervousness and anticipation, but it’s probably not enough to overwhelm her. This is a common response, but it suggests there is room for improvement in the way she deals with performance anxiety.
Perception of Success (6.5):
Clear improvements are shown in her performance in comparison to the first workshop. S felt better about her performance overall.
Comfort Level (8):
A major increase in comfort, indicating that she was able to stay much
more relaxed while playing.
Pre-performance Anxiety (1):
A score of 1 shows a big decrease in anxiety compared to
Workshop 1. While she reported still some bodily tension before playing, she was far less overwhelmed by nerves.
Mistake Acceptance (During) (7):
She was able to handle mistakes well, showing a shift
in mindset. Unlike Workshop 1, mistakes did not interfere with her performance in an overwhelming way.
Mistake Acceptance (After) (9):
The highest score for mistake acceptance after the
performance until now, suggesting that she was able to reflect positively on their progress.
Reflection:
The student felt much less nervous, though they still
experienced some bodily stiffness. This suggests that while their mindset improved,
some physical tension remained.
The student felt a clear reduction in anxiety, although she still reported some body tension.
This suggests that while her mindset improved, physical tension remained as in the past.
Durring her nervousness disappeared quickly, unlike in Workshop 1.
She was able to overcome mistakes more effectively and stay focused on the music.
S acknowledges improvements in managing nerves
but felt that better preparation could have helped her perform even better. This indicates growing self-awareness and a more constructive approach to improvement.
Perception of Success (7):
S gave a score of 7 to her performance, indicating that her confidence levels are
steadily increasing.
Comfort Level (6):
Comfort dropped slightly compared to Workshop 2, likely due to the
student feeling too energized before playing.
Pre-performance Anxiety (4):
Anxiety was slightly higher than Workshop 2, but still much
lower than Workshop 1. The student felt energized rather than nervous, which is a great
indication that she is channelling her energy in the right direction.
Mistake Acceptance (During) (6):
Mistakes were accepted fairly well, though not as
easily as in Workshop 2. S was still bothered by errors in intonation but remained
engaged in the music.
Mistake Acceptance (After) (8):
A score of 8 shows mistakes are not bothering her too
much anymore after she is done performing, a sign that the student is developing a
healthier attitude toward mistakes.
Reflection:
Instead of strong anxiety, the student reported feeling full of
energy, which, while positive, may have led to some restlessness. Regardless, interpreting
this feeling as “energized” is a great alternative to feeling overwhelmed with nerves.
She was, as self reported, more immersed in the music, which is a major improvement. While mistakes were present, they did not ruin the experience.
S recognizes that handling nerves was getting easier, a key sign of progress. Despite some self-criticism, she felt the performance was stronger overall.
Perception of Success (8):
S rates her performance an 8, the highest success rating
so far, showing increased confidence in her playing.
Comfort Level (5):
A small decrease in comfort, from a 6 to a 5, possibly due to increased self-awareness.
Pre-performance Anxiety (6): Higher than Workshop 2 and 3, but significantly lower than Workshop 1. The student still felt prepared despite the nerves.
Mistake Acceptance (During) (3): The lowest mistake acceptance score so far, meaning she weas more critical of herself in the moment of performance.
Mistake Acceptance (After) (7):
Improved post-performance reflection, indicating she
was able to look past mistakes, and perhaps use them as a learning moment.
Reflection:
The student felt a bit more nervous than in Workshop 3, but
felt prepared to step on stage.
S rates this as her most successful performance,
although her low mistake acceptance score (3) suggests self-judgment is still a detrimental factor that needs addressing.
Thoughts After the Performance: The student realized that nerves might not be as harmful as they initially thought. She noticed a pattern: her most successful performances happened when they felt at least some level of nervousness.